All posts by Coach VMcKee

What is Barre?

Personally, I love the dancer’s body. Toned, long and lean muscles, great posture, and strong! I appreciate the balance of strength AND flexibility. So, I’m going to start offering Barre Classes. Since I already mix some Barre moves into my current classes, it won’t be too much of a shock or surprise to any of my people wanting to try it out!

Just in case you want to know more – here are some answers to FAQ from Cosmopolitan Magazine on
JAN 23, 2018!

“What is barre?

Barre fitness is a hybrid workout class – combining ballet-inspired moves with elements of Pilates, dance, yoga and strength training. Most classes incorporate a ballet barre and use classic dance moves such as plies, alongside static stretches. Barre also focuses on high reps of small range movements.

But the real difference between barre and other workouts are the isometric movements you usually perform – holding your body still while you contract specific muscles, until you shake and feel the burn!

A lot of classes start with a warm up of push ups, tricep dips and planks, before moving to the barre, to focus on legs and your glutes. Then many classes end on the mat as you target the core, before a yoga-inspired cool-down. Some classes also use resistance bands and light hand weights to make the classes tougher to and to help build lean muscle, and mats for targeted core work.

What is it best for?

Barre delivers a full body workout, but it’s great for strengthening your core and toning your glutes and legs. Because ballet barre is low impact, it’s great if you recovering from an injury (let the instructor know if you have an injury so they can modify exercises accordingly!). Many barre classes can also be modified so they are a safe workout option for pre or post-natal clients. Barre workouts are also a good cross-training option to pair with other exercise like running, weight lifting or cycling, because they strengthen the muscles needed for these exercises without being too stressful on the body.

Are there other types of barre?

Depending on your studio, lots of different types of barre classes have started springing up, from cardio barre (where barre moves are coupled with a full on cardio workout), to HIIT barre (like cardio barre, but even more intense) and even yoga and pilates style classes where the emphasis is on stretching and relaxing rather than burning out your muscles.”

Be on the look out in the next couple of months for the new addition! Get started today by joining some of my other classes! It’s the best time of year to get started! (Anytime of the year is a good time to start….in case you were wondering!)

Thank you for your time! Hope to see you soon!
~Coach V

New Year – Same me.

Here we are again! This time it is 2018.

I have read so many inspiring posts in all of the social platforms out there. Truly, so many people with great hearts. I would LOVE to have 24/7 access to that kind of motivation.  But, I don’t – I have me, myself, and I.  And I have proven year after year that I allow life to distract me from my goals. I allow “busy” to take the front burner. Then 365 days are over and I’m only a few steps closer to my goals – but really, I feel as though I’ve failed.  (insert crybaby and eye rolling emojis here.)

SO.  I decided to take inventory of what usually distracts me. If you know me – my family comes first – always. But even with making every sports event, getting them to every practice, and making-ish dinner etc., there is in fact, no excuse, and EVEN time during the day to carve out for my goals. Hence my real problem. TIME MANAGEMENT.  This is the goal I repeatedly chase while it points and laughs at me.  Planners, reminders, post it notes, schedules…no success.  This tells me that my issue goes deeper. I can schedule things all day- but the lack of DISCIPLINE to follow the schedule is where it’s at for me.  Turns out, the hardest work is taking inventory of my self defeating habits. I sabotage myself without even thinking about it. There’s no need to go into WHY this happens – because that is a long story – we all have our long stories that make us who we are – and create opportunity for us to persevere. That’s all it is….opportunity to succeed anyway.

While everyone stumbles across different obstacles on their road to success – try going a bit deeper than your goals or resolutions themselves. Especially if you are a chronic resolution forfeit-er. Find your behavior or lack of action, or distraction and then figure out why you allow that to block or delay your success.

Personally, I’ve decided I’m taking care of myself first this year. I DESERVE to follow the schedule I set out for myself. I DESERVE to achieve the goals I set for myself.  I will not stand in my own way out of fear of success. I will talk to myself in a positive manner, and I do these things because that is what I want for my kids.  Those sentences are positive affirmations that I, or you, or anyone can say to yourself throughout the day to change those negative habits we have grown so comfortable with. I attach something strong to the end, “that is what I want for my kids” – because it gives me the motivation to continue to better myself. I want my kids to see me becoming better and they are a big motivator for me.  Find what motivates you, grab a hold of it and let it pull you forward this year.

new year same me

Fuel your FIRE!

Let’s talk about NUTRITION!  Woohoo!  Over the last few weeks, I have been asked about good protein shakes/options for adults, active or mal-nourished children, and adolescents…My personal preference is below – take it or leave it folks! 🙂  Skip to the end and click on the green link to gain more info on the protein my family uses daily!

Rumor and research has it that your food intake is responsible for 80% of your appearance. Well – I concur.  Eating a diet balanced with high quality proteins, “good” carbs, good fats,  and limited sugar – should prove, over time, to help you maintain a healthy weight.  But while, clearly, your diet is important. VERY important…so is working out. We need resistance training to keep our bones working, growing, and our body guessing.  Simply eating right will help prevent obesity, and possibly help with other issues, however, it won’t grow strength, agility, or balance. To grow old gracefully we need to step up our coordination and balance exercises…IT’S A MUST because it can help prevent falls and other injuries. (provided you use proper technique…which is where a good coach comes in!) I’m a firm believer in Interval training as the best way to improve metabolism, strength, and endurance while offering low impact options…I’m a low impact fan because we need to take care of our joints now to be as comfortable as possible later.  🙂  More on that subject later!

SO! In order to train effectively – you MUST be fueled properly. Here is where your diet is key. Please please please don’t train hard and long and expect to build muscle while functioning in a caloric deficit…you will fatigue very quickly and be at risk for injury due to poor form. Enter all programs slowly and well informed please!

Protein intake is essential to build muscle, and muscle is important to burn fat. We know there are TONS of protein options out there. TONS.  However, I strongly suggest you do your research. Powders can be difficult to absorb – while you take in some protein – likely it’s not as much as you think.  Some are full of other supplements that may or may not be messing with your hormones, brain, kidneys, liver, etc…  My family opts for a different type of protein.   Liquid Egg Whites (see link below) and we all love them. The kids put it in their cereal (me too) – mix it in chocolate milk, almond milk, iced coffee – orange juice…you can even make an egg white omelet!  They work miracles for those going through chemo – when nothing else can get down – these do…It’s easily digested – and you get it all folks…if you are set on your protein powder – just mix it in with these and double it up!   If you want to talk to someone in person – call them up – tell them that Coach Vanessa sent you – and start to build muscle and burn fat like no tomorrow!!

ALSO….Carbs are necessary…not the junky ones like cupcakes and white breads…but good carbs…mostly talking fruits and vegetables…high quality grains (unless you are going grain free)  and good fats are very important also – avocado, full fat butter, nuts, and olive oil to name a few…(these lubricate our joints as well as a great deal of other benefits!)  Always drink more water than you think you should and try to steer clear of diet fads and quick fixes. It took time to get “out of shape” and it will take time and effort to get back into a healthy state.  Persevere, operate with patience, love yourself in the middle of it all – and BE CONSISTENT.  Notice I didn’t say “be perfect”……just stay at it. You will see results.  If you have any questions, find me….we’ll talk.  Again – ease into any new program and do what YOU are able…just DO SOMETHING!   XOXOXO

Click Here to Order!
Click Here to Order!

The Struggle is Real

As I sat down to post my nutrition information – I read my last post which magically…was posted on THIS DAY – one year ago. If I believed in coincidence, that would be a strange one….but as the years pass by, the more my view on “chance” and “luck” change – It’s been a year full of emotion and hard work for most of us. I am always surprised when a full year seems to disappear. To look at my boys and realize they are no longer “boys” – they are breaching manhood at an alarming pace. And I love that. As much as it stings to feel the separation of your kid pulling away from mom to seek out his or her future, the wonderment of being ABLE to watch and guide is second to none.

If you know and talk to me often, it’s no secret that I am very close to both of my sons. My oldest is in his second year of high school – and my youngest is about to enter high school. It’s also no secret that I struggle with letting go. I am typically an open book about all things in my life. Even if I haven’t talked to you in a year, because things have been crazy, I may tell you how my son is struggling with the pressure of not playing football openly. I will stand before you with high hopes that you can offer some kind of sound wisdom from your personal life experience, or just listen and say nothing, and if you are dealing with any discomfort in your life that you will lay them out before me and give me the opportunity to help you in some way.  This is how I operate.  Frankly, small talk gives me anxiety. I don’t know how to do it. I try, and sometimes end up feeling like I have offended someone. Maybe because it comes across as fake…because I can’t sell it…I don’t know. If we have had an awkward moment like that – please accept my apologies. I take all the responsibility. My son says, “It’s only awkward if YOU make it awkward.”  I think there is truth in there. Lighten up!

So…struggling…we have become pretty good friends with each other. I try to do things my way, struggle shows up, I doubt and worry, and struggle more.  I have literally gotten to the point where I couldn’t handle ONE MORE THING. Feeling tired and overwhelmed all the time. And let me tell you friends – it’s not just that I wasn’t exercising as much as I should or that I was eating too much sugar…I wasn’t trusting God. I have trust issues – it’s cool. A lot of people do. If talking about God bothers you or offends you, I’m fine if you stop reading here. But if you struggle with yourself…I urge you to push on through my babbling.  The devil is sneaky.  That thing creeps in on our minds. Those demons are tough. Negative self talk, negative self image, doubt, worry, stress, hate, envy, temptation, pain….the list is super long and super important.  I am posting this because I have had at least 5 of the same conversations with different people all this week.  We don’t trust God. We think we can do all of this life stuff with our own brilliance.  NEWSFLASH.  It’s just not true. We dig ourselves into a hole that we can’t find our way out of in about a day. This hole probably has tunnels. Tunnels to our secret rooms of sin. Maybe we have a room of overeating, or working out so hard that the next day you literally can’t function (self harm)…or maybe it’s online shopping (a form of escape), or “innocently” flirting with your co-worker (attention seeking behavior)…or not having the courage to talk about heavy subjects with your kids – or playing video games too often or drinking, smoking, pornography, pills – IT’S EVERYWHERE, ALL THE TIME.  It takes more than strict self discipline to go at this alone. And not all of us have that.  Enter God.

If you are tired. God is not. If you are scared. God is not. If you are financially ruined. God is not. Whatever you are – most likely He isn’t. And if you think you have it figured out and you don’t seek God – you may need to think about what team you’re playing for.  My goal is not to offend, but like I said….that devil is sneaky. If he has you, you may not even know it.  I’ll just leave that there.

Easy start to turn your train around is to download the Bible App. You can check it out here. Y’all – it has brought my family train on the right track and trucking along pretty smoothly. Mostly because we use it.  The funny thing about the Bible…it’s pretty magical – but you have to give it the power to work in your life. You can hold it and I’m betting that will even help you feel better, but you know you have to seek Him for Him to rescue you from your hole.  There is a search function in the app – and you can put your current stress in there – “Anxiety”  “Fear”  “Lonely” “Scared”  “Finances” “Parenting” “Marriage”  – and just start a plan. You may not like them all – pick another one!  Just start to read…just let Him in – even if you already go to church and pray. I urge you to try harder.

Family time.  Church is great – I mean to take nothing away from the community church. I do feel it’s important to be around other people that share enthusiasm for the love of God, and that want to be better, etc. It’s great!  Currently, after praying and surveying our personal situation, we decided to try our own thing for a bit.  Church on our Porch – with our immediate family covering relevant issues with our teens.  Can you do both community church and home church? Of course.  Again, this was just a personal move that worked for us.  We went through some awesome YOUTH plans with the Bible App. We started there because we need to feed our youth positive and real coping skills to this world. It opened doors of communication that we didn’t even know where closed.  It offered support and humility, bonding and closeness….story time and help.  Was it because my husband and I are so awesome?  um. no.   It’s because God was there. It’s because we primed our hearts and sought him out to guide us.  If this sounds like a bunch of B.S. – it’s because you haven’t experienced it. That’s the simple answer.  I haven’t always been like this.  But I opened the door and I will never shut it. I urge you to open your door – let your kids see you open it – and share with them.

Don’t let Social Media and Games babysit your kids folks. Don’t let the internet and crappy TV raise your kids. Stand up – take control – they need it. They don’t really want to be the leader in the house – don’t allow that. Be a spiritual leader for your kids – start today. Don’t wait. If you have questions about how to help your family start a new weekly time to hang together that will benefit them and you for the remainder of this life – reach out to me and I will help you in any way that I can.  You have the tools – but you have to turn them on.   I pray that this finds you well – and that is serves you when and where you need it most.  Hugs!!!

kid on phone

Elusive Inspiration…

I love being inspired, it’s an AMAZING feeling. I am elevated to an addictive level and feel capable of brilliance. My gifts are being used exactly what they are purposed for…however… I apparently lack the ability to magically place my thoughts on “paper.” My super on-point, one of a kind material – becomes lame. Immediate feelings that my gifts are not as gifty as I thought creep in…. the lapse of time from walking to my lap top, the slowness of typing these things,  my incompetent mouse, with one single erroneous click, deletes whole paragraphs…thus creating ample room for doubt, frustration, and gargantuan space to forget my brilliance – and then…..it’s gone. Organizing thoughts on the screen suck the life out of my fleeting and fickle inspiration. My thoughts begin as a whimsical fairy with mesmerizing, gorgeous, flowy movements amidst sparkly luster dust which perfectly coordinates AND illuminates her every move, all the while the faint aroma of energizing citrus yet slightly floral goodness creates a harmonious masterpiece in my mind…Then as I ignore my wrestling children to sit down to share this enlightenment…the finished product mirrors a tortoise laying her eggs in the sand.  Still cool – but nothing sparkly, flowy, or pleasantly aromatic about it.

I can offer this.  If an idea crosses your mind – and it seems to be a good one – one leading to other inspirational thoughts….IMMEDIATELY write it down – I use my notes app on my phone. This works for me for a few reasons. Most importantly – they are all in one place – 2nd most important – I have my phone with me always because apparently people have fits (including myself) if I don’t.  So stop making 17 lists of ideas on 17 different pieces of paper.  Choose one notebook, one journal, one app, where you can stream all of your crazy and brilliant ideas for the life you want to lead and jot them down immediately.  You know as well as I do – when you try to remember your super amazing idea later….it just isn’t there, or maybe just a glimpse is there as it snickers at your confusion…  Whether you’re a song writer or the fundraiser chair in the PTO – If inspiration strikes while you are in the shower – get out of the shower – naked, cold and wet – and jot it down…it may not be pretty…but you will be so glad you did… Probably. Disclaimer: I don’t promise good ideas….just a way to access YOUR ideas later.  The “good” part is up to you and you alone brave one.

Discouragement.  The not so great natural part of inspiration, motivation, determination, etc.  It takes confidence to express your ideas in a clear and attractive manner.  Have you ever had an idea and casually started to talk to people about it? You start out excited and a little dorky – you find yourself seeking  approval in their expressions and body language – maybe they appear confused or disinterested – you feel your excitement dwindling mid conversation….You begin to doubt how cool your idea really is – you say things like – “I don’t know…it’s just a thought…” – you minimize your idea based on someone else’s lack of understanding or creativity – or their urge to go to the bathroom.  Do yourself a favor and decide right now not to do this.  Maybe hold off sharing your idea until you have really really worked out the kinks – or only share it with your “brain circle” – your think tank. This is your safe place where you really can air out your ideas in a group of understanding, like minded, people willing to offer beneficial and sound advice. Tossing it out to the general public is dangerous…it leaves you vulnerable and may cause you to squash something that could be great…before it’s truly matured.  Be careful who you share your thoughts with…until you are quite ready for the good, the bad, and the ugly.  How bad do you want and believe in your own success? If you aren’t serious about your goals…you will be easily deterred.  So get serious and proceed.

Inspire others.  Encourage others throughout the day….in the little things.  People…if you are having a hard time doing this…figure out why. Why is it hard for you to say nice things to someone?  Are you jealous for some reason?  Feeling bitter?  Are you afraid there isn’t enough success to go around and they might steal some of yours??  Search your heart for what you want out of life…then think about the joy others would gain from this same success…imagine the infinite abundance in the world…YES, there is an infinite supply of abundance, but it must be romanced into becoming your own. Know  with confidence there is more than enough to go around. By accepting this and genuinely wanting others to be successful and happy – you find yourself much closer to achieving your own. Not merely because positive networks filled with like-minded individuals are awesome – and beneficial – but because you are opening yourself to opportunity and growth to which the universe will respond positively…you know that you get what you give. Choose to be stingy and your success will be limited in reflection….if you choose to be generous – you will gain equally.  Choose to be happy for others in their triumphs and pray for a heart that gives freely without expecting something in return.  You will see results in yourself and your surroundings.

Lord, our creator of this beautiful Universe and the fibers that flow between us, we know we are called to love others the way we love ourselves. It’s not as difficult as we make it out to be. We choose to allow hate in our minds, we choose to allow others to manipulate our mood. I pray, instead, we will choose You.  That we will always seek the positive – even when we feel like everything is crumbling around us – I pray we will be the light for those truly in the dark. Help us get over ourselves – our spoiled attempts – and be happy for those around us while we strive to be the successful person you have chosen us to be.  I pray for the success of these readers, and I place them lovingly in Your hands, always.  xo

Let’s talk about Specs…

So, I deal with a lot of couples. Couples with kids, without kids, with same genitalia, with different genitalia, you name it.  There is one thing that is consistent….annoyance and frustration with partner.

What’s love got to do with it?…..got to do with it? What’s love, but a second hand emotion….  yeah…..yeah. I. did.

Are you “loving” them?  Are you?  If we’re being honest, we know that we don’t typically love the way we are “supposed” to. We shouldn’t be jealous, or quick to anger, we shouldn’t judge, or be irritated.  But if your life is like mine….that just isn’t the way it happens. Consider though, that the strongest thread of love might just be that you are CHOOSING each-other all the time. There are tons of people everywhere, all the time, they could be with – and maybe are, which we will get to… But USUALLY that person is choosing you daily.  Are they perfect? No. Are you? Nah ah.

So what, right? They choose us, we choose them. Great. Still irritated. He breathes gross, and picks at his face. She obsesses about every little imperfection and twirls her hair. I can’t even take it another second!  Yeah, you can. And you will. Because you can choose to overlook those things based on the GOOD. Don’t focus on the annoying habits of your partner. Seek the good habits and focus on those. Take a deep breath when they are being human – and overlook it. Because really – do you want them to focus on your grossness?  No. You want them to see the light inside you….and help make it brighter….

You aren’t made to be with a partner because of what that person brings to the table. You are made to be with a partner because you compliment each-other. Together you are a stronger individual BECAUSE of your quirks,  your lame awesomeness, and the fact that you both recognize that in each-other. You want someone to do life with…even on the bad days. Conflict provides an opportunity for growth if you’ll allow it.  And IF your partner is choosing to be with other people, and that’s not ok with you….CHOOSE to tell them to stop, forgive them if they do – OR CHOOSE SOMEONE ELSE and let them go.

You control your thoughts and actions which can change your environment. Be happier and show your partner that you are choosing to love them as they are, and you are willing to grow together….Did I say it was easy?  pfffffsssssssh. no.  But it is possible depending on how bad you want it.

Thank you Lord for the partner you have placed in my life. I ask you to watch over them and highlight their gifts in my eyes. I seek to love them the way you love me – and to always keep my gaze toward you.  If I am focused on you, then I can’t focus on them, and things will work out in your favor, not mine.

xo

 

Attitude Adjustment

I am officially irritated with myself.

I become so frustrated sometimes that I direct my negative energy at those around me…and they aren’t even doing anything wrong. I skew the reality so that it fits my state of mind…I’m already pissy, so you MUST be attacking me personally, punk. I am rolling my eyes because I know better, and still get sucked in.  I am surrounded by an excellent community full of fantastic people, ready and willing to help in any way, as long as I am receptive. (Please note: this does not apply to every person; adjustment is also probably temporary…) BUT….point being: I’m irritated with my ill thoughts and agitated tendencies towards individuals that truly don’t deserve it.  I haven’t flipped out on anyone (other than my husband) – but I sure have thought about it and may have even hoped for the opportunity….

I’ve had a rough couple of weeks – no different than anyone else, but managed to grossly misplace my negative energy. Annoying.  I couldn’t figure out what the deal was…so I asked that often as if it would help….”What’s my deal?”  “I don’t know WHAT my deal is lately….” – now that I see that question in print….what does that even mean?  I had a little inner chat to take notice of some of the emotional disturbances that have occurred lately and allowed myself to feel sad, forgave myself for those human moments, and apologized for choosing the easy way of taking it out on others.

We are allowed to have bad days and poor perspective. But we should never ever let it become the norm. Attitudes are contagious. Choose wisely which color will tint your glasses. Fight the urge to turn to the dark side. Not everyone is out to get us. It just feels like it sometimes. If you are where I was last week – take some time to figure out where the toxic root is in your mind or your spirit. Pull that bastard out and crush it. Don’t let it poison your days and the days of others. On that same token…don’t allow someone else’s crappy attitude to become your own. Choose how you think…even if someone is saying things that hurt…you can hear it…but you don’t have to internalize it as fact.  Hit delete and move on.

Lord, I thank you for the people that care about me enough to put up with me on my worst days. I ask for forgiveness for the times that I wasn’t strong enough to shut my mouth or turn off my negative thoughts. I know that through you, I can be the person I’m meant to be. One that is encouraging, supportive, and kind. After all, I want to spread love….and I can only do that if I’m loving myself through you.

Bring it on.

woman in sunshine

Whatever. I’m busy.

It’s hard to admit how often I’ve dismissed “play time” with my boys because of something else I’ve chosen over them. I know it was a good exercise, for them to wait patiently for me to play. It helps them realize they can’t be the center of attention all the time. They must learn to wait their turn while a task is being completed and that not everyone will jump upon immediate request of affection. But that doesn’t help me feel better about the years I’ve missed in exchange for meaningless tasks.  Deep Sigh.

Well – lesson learned. I have since grown to fully understand how it feels. I see my kids with their phones, video games, bike riding, friend visiting – and the tables are slowly turning. I find myself wanting to spend time with them and THEY are suddenly becoming “busy”…. oh….do you hear that?  It’s the sound of this mom’s heart tearing. Which, I know, like any muscle…tears are only indicative of strength after healing.  Still bitter sweet knowing they are exercising their rite of passage to independence.  On one hand I feel confident I’m doing something right. I haven’t made them feel like they can’t do life without me. They venture from home for a bit, then come back and hug and hang with me. They appear well rounded and well adjusted.

Time is officially working against me though. I find myself fighting back. Offering to do things for them they can do themselves hoping to show them love because we don’t hug all the time anymore, they don’t sit on my lap, or cling me to death…  Well – let’s just play the Enabler card now, shall we? I have created an inner battle around my role in the family. Confused about how to nurture without enabling and how to instill responsibility without abandonment. I’m rearing men…not baby boys. Because, let’s face it…a grown man still attached to his mommy is in NO way attractive. So, I’m putting my big girl panties on, (pretty ones…of course, so not to lose my femininity in a house full of guys)… and keeping my expectations high of their level of involvement in this family. And I know deep down it will pay off…but I will still long for the days of true tender love, bonding, and innocence of holding my babies as they sleep since they are long gone.   As they should be, because how awkward to hold my 145 lb 13 year old as he sleeps, inevitably drooling on me as I suffocate.  No thanks.

Lord, thank you for the time I have with my children. I struggle fiercely to hold on loosely as they grow into men that follow you, not me, thankfully. Please watch over them when I can’t. Mainly because I fear I would not be able to act responsibly if someone were to harm them.  Deep breathing as I place them in your loving and protective hands. All my love for your forgiveness of my daily blunders. In your name I pray for so many…

So this is blogging…

FINALLY.

Life often wedges itself in the way of our plans. Usually, I find those wedges to be a great starting point to anxiety. Going with the “flow” – isn’t just about rolling over and giving up your dreams. It’s more about accepting that sometimes the fight is meant to occur on another day. And that today, a more pressing issue demands our attention. We should acknowledge that, but NEVER accept it as an excuse to give up. So – I have finally arrived to the destination “blogger” – a few months off schedule – and some pain and joy in the midst of the marathon, but full of valuable trinkets to share thanks to my tangent…I’m pumped….you should be too.