Let’s talk about Specs…

So, I deal with a lot of couples. Couples with kids, without kids, with same genitalia, with different genitalia, you name it.  There is one thing that is consistent….annoyance and frustration with partner.

What’s love got to do with it?…..got to do with it? What’s love, but a second hand emotion….  yeah…..yeah. I. did.

Are you “loving” them?  Are you?  If we’re being honest, we know that we don’t typically love the way we are “supposed” to. We shouldn’t be jealous, or quick to anger, we shouldn’t judge, or be irritated.  But if your life is like mine….that just isn’t the way it happens. Consider though, that the strongest thread of love might just be that you are CHOOSING each-other all the time. There are tons of people everywhere, all the time, they could be with – and maybe are, which we will get to… But USUALLY that person is choosing you daily.  Are they perfect? No. Are you? Nah ah.

So what, right? They choose us, we choose them. Great. Still irritated. He breathes gross, and picks at his face. She obsesses about every little imperfection and twirls her hair. I can’t even take it another second!  Yeah, you can. And you will. Because you can choose to overlook those things based on the GOOD. Don’t focus on the annoying habits of your partner. Seek the good habits and focus on those. Take a deep breath when they are being human – and overlook it. Because really – do you want them to focus on your grossness?  No. You want them to see the light inside you….and help make it brighter….

You aren’t made to be with a partner because of what that person brings to the table. You are made to be with a partner because you compliment each-other. Together you are a stronger individual BECAUSE of your quirks,  your lame awesomeness, and the fact that you both recognize that in each-other. You want someone to do life with…even on the bad days. Conflict provides an opportunity for growth if you’ll allow it.  And IF your partner is choosing to be with other people, and that’s not ok with you….CHOOSE to tell them to stop, forgive them if they do – OR CHOOSE SOMEONE ELSE and let them go.

You control your thoughts and actions which can change your environment. Be happier and show your partner that you are choosing to love them as they are, and you are willing to grow together….Did I say it was easy?  pfffffsssssssh. no.  But it is possible depending on how bad you want it.

Thank you Lord for the partner you have placed in my life. I ask you to watch over them and highlight their gifts in my eyes. I seek to love them the way you love me – and to always keep my gaze toward you.  If I am focused on you, then I can’t focus on them, and things will work out in your favor, not mine.

xo

 

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