The Struggle is Real

As I sat down to post my nutrition information – I read my last post which magically…was posted on THIS DAY – one year ago. If I believed in coincidence, that would be a strange one….but as the years pass by, the more my view on “chance” and “luck” change – It’s been a year full of emotion and hard work for most of us. I am always surprised when a full year seems to disappear. To look at my boys and realize they are no longer “boys” – they are breaching manhood at an alarming pace. And I love that. As much as it stings to feel the separation of your kid pulling away from mom to seek out his or her future, the wonderment of being ABLE to watch and guide is second to none.

If you know and talk to me often, it’s no secret that I am very close to both of my sons. My oldest is in his second year of high school – and my youngest is about to enter high school. It’s also no secret that I struggle with letting go. I am typically an open book about all things in my life. Even if I haven’t talked to you in a year, because things have been crazy, I may tell you how my son is struggling with the pressure of not playing football openly. I will stand before you with high hopes that you can offer some kind of sound wisdom from your personal life experience, or just listen and say nothing, and if you are dealing with any discomfort in your life that you will lay them out before me and give me the opportunity to help you in some way.  This is how I operate.  Frankly, small talk gives me anxiety. I don’t know how to do it. I try, and sometimes end up feeling like I have offended someone. Maybe because it comes across as fake…because I can’t sell it…I don’t know. If we have had an awkward moment like that – please accept my apologies. I take all the responsibility. My son says, “It’s only awkward if YOU make it awkward.”  I think there is truth in there. Lighten up!

So…struggling…we have become pretty good friends with each other. I try to do things my way, struggle shows up, I doubt and worry, and struggle more.  I have literally gotten to the point where I couldn’t handle ONE MORE THING. Feeling tired and overwhelmed all the time. And let me tell you friends – it’s not just that I wasn’t exercising as much as I should or that I was eating too much sugar…I wasn’t trusting God. I have trust issues – it’s cool. A lot of people do. If talking about God bothers you or offends you, I’m fine if you stop reading here. But if you struggle with yourself…I urge you to push on through my babbling.  The devil is sneaky.  That thing creeps in on our minds. Those demons are tough. Negative self talk, negative self image, doubt, worry, stress, hate, envy, temptation, pain….the list is super long and super important.  I am posting this because I have had at least 5 of the same conversations with different people all this week.  We don’t trust God. We think we can do all of this life stuff with our own brilliance.  NEWSFLASH.  It’s just not true. We dig ourselves into a hole that we can’t find our way out of in about a day. This hole probably has tunnels. Tunnels to our secret rooms of sin. Maybe we have a room of overeating, or working out so hard that the next day you literally can’t function (self harm)…or maybe it’s online shopping (a form of escape), or “innocently” flirting with your co-worker (attention seeking behavior)…or not having the courage to talk about heavy subjects with your kids – or playing video games too often or drinking, smoking, pornography, pills – IT’S EVERYWHERE, ALL THE TIME.  It takes more than strict self discipline to go at this alone. And not all of us have that.  Enter God.

If you are tired. God is not. If you are scared. God is not. If you are financially ruined. God is not. Whatever you are – most likely He isn’t. And if you think you have it figured out and you don’t seek God – you may need to think about what team you’re playing for.  My goal is not to offend, but like I said….that devil is sneaky. If he has you, you may not even know it.  I’ll just leave that there.

Easy start to turn your train around is to download the Bible App. You can check it out here. Y’all – it has brought my family train on the right track and trucking along pretty smoothly. Mostly because we use it.  The funny thing about the Bible…it’s pretty magical – but you have to give it the power to work in your life. You can hold it and I’m betting that will even help you feel better, but you know you have to seek Him for Him to rescue you from your hole.  There is a search function in the app – and you can put your current stress in there – “Anxiety”  “Fear”  “Lonely” “Scared”  “Finances” “Parenting” “Marriage”  – and just start a plan. You may not like them all – pick another one!  Just start to read…just let Him in – even if you already go to church and pray. I urge you to try harder.

Family time.  Church is great – I mean to take nothing away from the community church. I do feel it’s important to be around other people that share enthusiasm for the love of God, and that want to be better, etc. It’s great!  Currently, after praying and surveying our personal situation, we decided to try our own thing for a bit.  Church on our Porch – with our immediate family covering relevant issues with our teens.  Can you do both community church and home church? Of course.  Again, this was just a personal move that worked for us.  We went through some awesome YOUTH plans with the Bible App. We started there because we need to feed our youth positive and real coping skills to this world. It opened doors of communication that we didn’t even know where closed.  It offered support and humility, bonding and closeness….story time and help.  Was it because my husband and I are so awesome?  um. no.   It’s because God was there. It’s because we primed our hearts and sought him out to guide us.  If this sounds like a bunch of B.S. – it’s because you haven’t experienced it. That’s the simple answer.  I haven’t always been like this.  But I opened the door and I will never shut it. I urge you to open your door – let your kids see you open it – and share with them.

Don’t let Social Media and Games babysit your kids folks. Don’t let the internet and crappy TV raise your kids. Stand up – take control – they need it. They don’t really want to be the leader in the house – don’t allow that. Be a spiritual leader for your kids – start today. Don’t wait. If you have questions about how to help your family start a new weekly time to hang together that will benefit them and you for the remainder of this life – reach out to me and I will help you in any way that I can.  You have the tools – but you have to turn them on.   I pray that this finds you well – and that is serves you when and where you need it most.  Hugs!!!

kid on phone

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